Virtually There

I am so bored with myself.

The same three topics keep flipping through my head to such an extent that little else is allowed room to express itself.

1) Job (What??)

2) Money (How??)

3) Housing (Where??)

Throw in the thoughts on

4) Love/happiness (Who??)

and you just entered my brain.

The combinations and the thoughts on the extent to which the topics should be balanced against each other are endless: money + job, job + love, love + money, money + housing, housing + love…. Etc. etc. etc.

These questions about my future cause me no pleasure, and, as no real answers can be found at the time being, the never ending cycle is digging my emotional self into a hole a shovel full of thoughts at a time.

I feel like slapping myself Carol Burnett/Gone with the Wind/Mammie style to try to break the manic synapse obsession.

I’m going to Kevin’s house on Nantucket this weekend. I’m hoping that the change of scenery will jumpstart something in my brain that will adjust my outlook and thought process.

It really isn’t that serious. I’m just over it. Bored with my tedium.

In other news I had a great weekend with my friend from Syracuse, Jason. He was in town to assist the lighting designer of the Tony’s (which also was my ‘in’ to see the dress rehearsal of the show- very exciting). We also were able to see Grey Gardens (disappointing, but we saw an understudy performance). Went out Friday, recovered with theatre - all in all not a bad way to spend a weekend.